Torres has left us. Fernando, that is.
Fernando Torres left Liverpool Football Club on transfer day dateline after 3 years at the club where he attained idol status for his prolific goal scoring strike rate.
While, we (hoomans, reina and ahem, torres) were all shell shocked, it didn't take long before shock turned into disappointment. First, we read about his parting shot at Liverpool, that Chelsea, the enemy he switched sides for, were the bigger club. Then, he was quoted as saying he hoped to score against Liverpool. We can understand the need to impress your new owners, but this new level of bootlicking, even by our high frequency licking standards, seriously takes the cake. And when you thought it could not get any worse, he later declared that he never loved Liverpool. Judas, Fraudnando and Traitorres are just some of the nicknames labeled on the man, once worshiped by the Anfield faithful. We can understand why.
He was a great classy player, but the manner which he left was anything but classy.
Torres' departure isn't the breaking news that I'm sharing though. It's something else. Something bigger. Are you ready?
Suarez is the new Torres! Yes, you read it right. We're changing Torres' name to Suarez. Reason being we can no longer call my precious little brother by the name of a traitor. No worries, he is totally fine with the name change. He responds immediatedly to his new name Suarez! Phonetically amiss but blessing in disguise if you ask me!
A search on google for the meaning of Suarez yielded results of Suave, Sleek, Smooth and Quiet, which is like totally how Suarez is like! Somehow, the name Torres which was supposed to symbolise tower of strength, never really identified with Suarez. Now we know why!
So there you have it. It's official. It's now Miss Reina and Suave Suarez.
Gong Xi Gong Xi! Happy Lunar New Year!